


I’ll be your stars, if you be my sky

by CalsBeanieProtection



Category: Ballum, EastEnders
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-07
Updated: 2020-06-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:08:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24597262
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CalsBeanieProtection/pseuds/CalsBeanieProtection
Summary: Little one shot!Callum has a breakdown and Ben supports him, plus some cute fluff
Relationships: Ballum - Relationship, Ben x Callum - Relationship
Comments: 1
Kudos: 57





	I’ll be your stars, if you be my sky

Callum retreats to the bathroom, stating he needed a shower. He doesn’t, having had one earlier this morning, he just didn’t want Ben to see the hurt he was hiding, he had enough of his own problems. 

Turning the taps full blast, Callum slides down the wall slowly, head in his hands, feeling the lump in his throat rising to the surface. A sob escapes his lips, and before he knows it he’s crying so hard his vision is blurred. His tears stream, creating a pool between his legs where they escape. The burn in his throat becomes unbearable, loosing his fight to be quiet. He bites into his hand, to stop his screams from echoing throughout the small flat and alerting Ben. 

Callum slowly allows all the walls he’s built high to crumble, laying in broken fragments all around him. Everything he’s fought to fight down reaches the surface and erupts like a volcano. He let’s go of everything he’s feeling, all the emotion he’s holding inside. 

He hears a light tapping on the door, and freezes.

“Cal? Baby?” Ben’s nickname for him causes his heart to hurt, as he hears the softness his voice holds. 

“I’ll be out soon,” Callum forces out, quickly dashing the tears from his face with his sleeve. 

He doesn’t get the chance to stand before Ben is opening the door and walking into the small bathroom. 

“Cal...” Callum watches the sorrow form onto Ben’s features as he crosses the space and turns off the taps. Kneeling down he places a gentle hand to Callum’s cheek. 

Callum leans into his touch, feeling more tears escape. 

“Come here,” is all Ben has to say, pulling his boyfriend to him, before Callum collapses into his arms, crying freely. 

“Shh, I’ve got you, we’re gonna be okay,” Ben’s soft words are not lost on Callum and he appreciates the support and love Ben is offering him. 

Ben let’s Callum cry for the longest time, whispering small words into his ear and stroking his hair gently. Soon Callum’s sobs turn to hiccups, and he lifts his head. His red, swollen eyes search Bens who never once looses eye contact. 

“Even like this, you’re beyond beautiful,” Ben says, pushing a stray piece of hair from Callum’s forehead out the way, before running his finger down the side of his cheek. 

Callum manages a small smile, and if Ben knows it’s fake he doesn’t question him. Instead he stands and pulls Callum to his feet gently, leading him out of the bathroom and into bed. 

“I’ll be back in a minute,” he states before heading off. 

Callum hears him rustling around, but he hasn’t the foggiest idea what he’s doing. 

He comes in barely five minutes later with a steaming mug in his hand, handing it to Callum. 

“Hot chocolate, just the way you like it,” Ben announces, pride evident in his voice. 

This elicits a quiet laugh from Callum. He knows how bad Ben is at making anything other than black coffee. 

“Thank you,” he says before taking a sip gingerly, checking the temperature before realising Ben has made it to the perfect drinking temperature. He takes another drink, and watches Ben as he sits on the bed beside him. 

“You gonna give me some of the covers or not?” He jokes, before sliding down a little. 

Callum groans sarcastically and moves off Bens half of the cover, before putting it over him. They sit in silence as Callum finishes his drink, setting the cup down on the small table beside him. 

“Ben, thank you,” he murmurs, turning to look at him. 

“I could hear you crying. The taps didn’t really do much to block anything out. You didn’t have to hide away Cal, I’d have listened.”

Callum looks down ashamed. He isn’t sure why he didn’t want Ben to know he was crying. He doesn’t do it regularly, but tonight he didn’t want to worry Ben. 

“What happened?” 

Taking a shaky breath, Callum laid his head down on Bens chest, his arm snaking it’s way across his stomach and he sighs contently as Bens fingers find their way into his hair. 

“I had a nightmare last night.” His words cause Ben to stiffen slightly, he as Callum draws small patterns on his hide, he relaxes. 

“It was so vivid, everything felt so real, like I was there living it all over again. I saw that little girls face, and her mums, god Ben I’ll never get over that face. How I couldn’t save her and she knew Ben, she knew she was gonna die. ” Ben allowed Callum to speak, never once interrupting. He presses feathered kisses to the side of his head a few times. 

“I woke up and you weren’t there, and I panicked. I didn’t know where you were and part of me thought you’d gone and left me too.”

Bens fingers stop their movement, which causes Callum to look up, their blues connecting. 

“Callum, I’d never leave you, I only went to take Lexi to school, it was my day.”

Callum nods slowly, “I know.” 

“I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything, I was scared.”

“You don’t have to be scared Cal, I’m here for you always.” Ben leans down, his lips brushing against Callum’s, who allows Ben to kiss him, humming quietly into his mouth, feeling content. 

They break apart after a few minutes and Ben leans his head against Callum’s. 

“You can always come to me, you know that don’t you? I don’t want you to feel like I won’t be there for you.”

“I just didn’t want to bother you, I know you haven’t long got your hearing back, and I didn’t want to just put all my problems on you.”

Ben moves slightly so he can look at Callum but still hold him in his arms.

“Your problems are my problems. You were there for me through everything with my hearing and you never gave up, let me be there for you.”

Callum nods in acknowledgement. Perhaps letting Ben in wasn’t a bad idea. “Okay,” he whispers. 

They lie in each other’s arms for a time and before long Ben hears the soft snores emitting from Callum letting him know he’d fallen asleep. He shifts slightly so he’s lying down and Callum curls further into his side, seeking the warmth he holds. 

Ben listens to the rain pelting off the windows, the storm outside picking up its strength. He thinks back to earlier when he was caught up in it on his way home from shopping, and how it had nearly ruined the surprise he had bought for Callum. Something he knew would need to wait until it was dryer. Callum had a thing for the stars, Ben knew this from the countless times he would make him sit out in the garden and freeze his arse off to look at them. He’d listen contently as Callum named a few as Orion's Belt, Polaris - which Ben later learned he in fact knew, he just knew it as the North Star. He mentioned the Sirius star, citing it as amongst one of his favourites as it reminded him of Bens love for Harry Potter. He would point to stars in the sky and say they formed a question mark, something that even with his glasses on Ben failed to see. Alas, his favourite star, he would say, was Ben. 

‘I’d look for you in every galaxy and universe’ he’d say, melting Bens heart each time. Ben hoped he liked the telescope he had bought, it would allow Callum to see the stars more clearly. 

To Ben, Callum was the sun, stars and moon all in one. He was a ray of light when it was needed, a brightness within the dark. He was the illumination within Bens heart that warmed him so deeply. ‘The sky would never be full of stars, if everyone had to wish upon the same one’ he’d say, before following it up with ‘I wished to find something worth fighting for one day, and it gave me you.’ It was that moment Ben realised just how truly in love with Callum he was. 

Kissing his head gently, Ben smiles at the man sleeping in his arms, wondering what he did to ever deserve him. He’d thank his lucky stars for the rest of his life for bringing Callum to him. To Ben the stars were the angels never forgotten, and Callum was his angel, and he vowed that night to pick a star in a sky, and name it Callum. 

Ben settles down, tiredness hitting him. 

“Look at the stars, look how they shine for you...” he began to sing slowly. He feels Callum’s smile against his chest, and he knows he’s awake. 

Callum lifts his head sleepily, his eyes finding Bens who hold their own shine. Ben speaks first. 

“There will always be stars in the sky, whether we see them or not, but the one that shines the brightest in my heart is you, Callum Highway.”

Callum smiles a sleepy, toothy smile and settles his head back onto Ben. 

“If you be my star, I’ll be your sky,” he replies. They fall asleep together, safe and content within each other’s arms. 

For both Ben and Callum home isn’t a place. It is each other, and when they’re safe together under the stars, each of them are home. 

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments welcome 🙂


End file.
